I often have no plans on the weekend. Don’t know why, but my plans are always made Monday to Thursday and sometimes Sunday. Friday and Saturday nights are left quite alone. Even so, in terms of getting actual work done, Fridays usually go to hell because my learned reaction to Friday is one of anticipation. Because I know this to be true, I often make Thursday night my “night with no bounds” (haha, or try to) where you will not hear an “I must go to the lab tomorrow” from me.
Last night I went to this club, Ginger 62 (or is it a lounge?) with Andrew to see the Manvils play for a small group of people. Some young eager band opened for them but I was to enthralled with the Bettie Page videos they were projecting on the wall to listen - they were so historical! Seriously! The metascenario of my night had me considering how disjointed I felt from the flow of activity. I am an observer, I thought. So I wondered, being an observer, how much am I affected by what I observe? Even though I feel numb to things around me, have they collected into my subconsciousness to be packaged and redistributed through my choices at a later date? Probably. But to what extent?


This feeling of being an observer has continued into today. I went back downtown this afternoon to renew my passport. As if being downtown is not overwhelming enough for someone who can’t help but observe everything, I had to wait in a constructed government space for an hour, watching people who were all there for the same purpose being herded into lines and rows of chairs and numbers like good Canadian sheep.
My trip downtown was almost wasted. Turns out I was smiling a little too much in my original picture. A few milimetres of teeth were showing. I had to go downstairs and get another picture taken. I wanted to say, “that is my neutral look! I am always secretly mildly amused by something!”, but being the sheep I am I followed the receptionist’s instructions. It was okay that in the second picture taken I still had teeth showing. I was preparing myself for them to not accept that picture either but they did. Had they not I would have had to point out that I thought my mouth was closed but having crooked teeth, it’s hard to hide the one tooth that likes to stick out. This could be a disability (??) and refusing the picture could be discrimination.
Ha ha no I would probably just get another picture. I am a sheep.
So it’s already late late afternoon on Friday and I have yet to accomplishing much today but get my passport renewed. One thing distracting me is my thoughts on going to Regina in a week. There are many things to look forward to and in an effort to quit thinking about them and get to work I shall list them here (in no particular order):
celebrations on the 15th with just-done-finals folk (that stress release energy is always the best)
horseback riding
miniwheats
kim’s christmas party (and being around girls in general)
electric guitar & piano
friends, family (of course) & visit to grandma’s
piles of snow (does anybody want to go crazy carpeting?)
people to eat things I make
playing video games & general comfiness of family room couch
costume party (yes I still want to do this…better get planning)
fireplace
Star-Wars-athon
uninterrupted time for thesis research (hahaha…yes we shall see)
Oh more could be said but it’s getting late and this is getting long. It’s weird, for the past two days I’ve been narrating my life like it is all going to be written here. Hmm…am I starved for attention? Haha. Need more contact…people…yeah. So if you are reading this, and would like to read it (again) with a soundtrack listen to this: Final Fantasy - “The CN Tower Belongs to the Dead.mp3″