Last night I didn’t sleep well. I think my body is fighting something which won’t get the chance to take things over completely (knock on wood) but, it did cause a lot of restless rolling around.
And I dreamed. I’ve been dreaming a lot lately but still dreams I only vaguely remember. Last night’s dreams were longer and epic-like. I traveled to an island that I think was in Japan but it had been Americanized so completely that I don’t think there were any Japanese people there. Or maybe I was actually in America somewhere and I thought it was Japan. I don’t know, it was a weird mash-up and I was stranded at a gas-stop on one side of the island, surrounded by parking spaces, long blades of dried grass, a charcoal gray sky and wind blowing at small white, red, and blue triangle-flag garlands marking the boundaries of the establishments sharing that slab of concrete. How could it have been Japan? Maybe because I felt I was somewhere foreign? Because I think I had reservations at a ryokan across the island but I had no idea how to get there. I was lost. I had no money. I had my cell phone but only one bar of battery power, no charger, and it was actually not subscribed to a network - really it was a clock for me to monitor how much time I had before something happened.
I knew something would happen but I don’t know what. I had mud on my pants and I was planning where I could, as a last resort, find warmth and curl up for a night nap. My dream occasionally cut to sequences showing the people who I had gone to the island with. They were wondering where I could be. But, my sleeping self wondered if this was actually happening (in my dream) or only my dreaming self’s fantasy of people wanting to find her. Then I couldn’t even remember how I came to be where I was, and who I had been with before.
I woke up from that, not lost, in my room, but my mind still heavily in the state it was during the dream. Falling back to sleep again, I found myself in a room on a high floor in an apartment building. A lot of people were coming in and out and for each person, I had to be suspicious of whether they were on my side or not. I think this part of my dream may have been influenced by my recent Buffy watching - but I don’t think I was questioning whether these people were vampires or not. More like spies. There was a heavy early 80s spy show atmosphere. Someone left a cigarette burning on a dark brown wood coffee table. The rest of the furniture was similar to that in my home before we moved to Regina (pre-1986).
I’m rabbling aren’t I? I guess the dreams didn’t really have remarkable events, just heavy atmospheres and an ongoing feeling that I need to be prepared for something.
Stress much?
