It is almost settled. My thesis defense date is almost set to be February 11th or 12th.

Holy crap. And I feel so utterly unprepared.

If I act like a robot in the next three weeks - it is because I am somewhat in panic mode.

Though in some ways I don’t feel panicked. I feel unprepared because I’ve never experienced what I’m preparing for and it’s really scary. There is a lot of work…but it doesn’t mean I can’t get the job done.

But please, if you can remember, in the next three weeks, please don’t ask me “how’s the thesis going?”. Things I prefer:

“Hey Meghan, do you want some cookies?”

“Have you seen some annoying advertisements lately?”

“How much do you ‘love’ CVS Meghan?” (This is if you want me to cry but I am willing to engage in this discussion if you are able to remind me about CVS’s good points.)

and “Hey, what’s your favorite colour today?”

In case you were thinking that I missed “how’s the job hunt going” on that list…I didn’t. I put out a few applications last week. I hope to get a few more out by the end of this week. But other than that, I need to focus on my thesis. If I am asked about the job hunt too much - I might have to start lying.

In December at a Christmas party someone popped the H’sTT question and I answered honestly. “So, so, but it’s taking so long. I have been making progress, but only bit by bit. It seems so hard”. A friend and fellow student hearing this laughed at me, “Meghan - you’re too honest! Most people would just say ‘yeah yeah it’s going great, no problems there!’”

It occurred to me that I could do that. It would feel like a lie but what about all those times someone asks “how are you?” and you respond “great!” despite the cold-shower-stubbed-toe-forgot-to-charge-the-ipod-morning.

I think I might stick with telling the truth. And I should talk about my cold showers more.